Getting closer

I'm starting to get a little more nervous about my chemo treatment. But I don't really know why. I've gotten plenty of info, so I know what's going to happen, met some of the staff at the cancer center, and I'll have my anti-naseua drugs at home. Maybe it's just because this is something new and I don't know what to expect after. Will I get sick? Will it be right off, or will it be a couple days after? Will I be too fatigued to go to work the rest of the week? When will I start to lose my hair? How will I really react to that? Up to now, other than feeling a lump, I've got no physical signs I have cancer. Whatever reactions I have to treatment will solidify that I do.

But at least things are finallyl starting to move on. Before, all the poking and injecting and scanning was just more info gathering, really. Now the fight starts. I'm up for it, and I've got family and friends close by offering support and any help they can. Outside of Mom, I don't know how much actual help they'll have the opportunity to be, but just knowing people are there if we need them is a help in itself.

I got my first scarf:

It's from vintagepimp.com. They had some pretty cool stuff.

My goal for the day had been to get all my laundry finished and get my closet organized. I got that mostly done. I still have a load in the washer that I just never got around to hanging out or putting in the dryer. But the closet's pretty well cleaned up (I have a big, walk-in). I had also wanted to get all the cancer stuff organized into the expanding file I bought -- all the info about drugs, diet, insurance, bills, etc all together. Didn't get that done. It'll give me something to to do tomorrow night.

Tomorrow I'll probably stop by the library and see what book(s) I can get, and I got "This is Spinal Tap" from Netflix late last week. I've never seen it (not all of it at least), so maybe I'll watch it Wednesday if I feel up to having a good laugh.

I've gotten used to my port, pretty much. It doesn't hurt anymore. It just kind of feels like ... ummm. I'm not really sure. Sometimes it's like when you pull a muscle and you have kind of knot-like feeling in one particular spot. Other times it's like there's something rubbing against my skin ... only from the wrong side.

I know I've kind of rambled, but that's the kind of day it's been. Not real focused. I'll be at work tomorrow, so I can hope I can get it together. I've got to get a few things done before Tuesday in case I have to take another day or two off. If I don't feel up to posting an update after this week's treatment, a friend has offered to do that for me, so check in late Tuesday or Wednesday.

Later
JunO