Can't get my therapy

I think the hardest thing about this past week and dealing with the low white blood cell count is that I can't even really get my preferred therapy -- working in the yard. Whenever I've felt down before, I could go always go outside and pull some weeds or trim the grass around my flowerbeds, deadhead some wildflowers and spread the seeds, and then later sit back with something cool to drink and enjoy the yard. But the don't want me working in the yard, since my immune system is so compromised. And so I get to sit and watch Mom do it. Or at least try, because with her schedule, chauffeuring me back and forth to the cancer center every day, the heat and the good mower that needs to get to the shop, the yard has gotten overgrown. The backyard is well over six inches tall, the weeds are choking out the groundcover we planted on the hill and the front and side yard is started to look a little ragged.

My yard isn't gloriously landscaped by any means, but we like what little we've been able to do so far. And now it's hard to enjoy when I see Mom working hard out there in the heat, doing what she can each day, while the rest creeps on behind her.

If my count comes up, maybe next week I can get out and help if I take a few precautions like wearing gloves and long pants, etc. But for now it kind of hurts that I can't do anything.