Thursday, February 28, 2008

Spoke too soon

So all my bitching about having to go to Wichita? I take that back. And I'll be going back on Monday.

Wednesday morning, almost first thing at work, I got a call from my surgeon here. "You don't want to hear from me," she said. "They found something." Gotta love how direct she is. (Really, she is the best). The MRI shows something, about 4 cm, in the right breast -- the opposite side of where I had my cancer. It took a minute or so for it sink in. And by the time I got off the phone with her, I was shaking and tearing up. I headed for the bathroom, pausing to ask a co-worker to come with me, and I told her what the doc had said. Poor Kim. She's lost some good friends and family to cancer, so I'm sure it was hard for her to hear what I said, but I'm glad she was there for me (and I told her so). She took me out to lunch, and then she even drove me to see my surgeon in the afternoon. It's hard to find friends like that.

I did go see the surgeon Wednesday afternoon, and she did a sonogram. But she couldn't find anything but a plain old cyst. That's a good sign, but I'll still be going back to Wichita, where they will do an MRI-guided biopsy. Dad will be going with me, so that'll be good. And the appointment is in the afternoon, so we don't have leave before dawn.

I'm doing all right. Some good words from friends, co-workers and family have done a lot of good. And playing with Buster takes my mind off things. I have a good feeling about this, really. I'll deal with whatever comes my way, but of course, I'm hoping for the best.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

A long day's drive ... and for what?

That's what I'm wondering after spending a good chunk of the day on the road today.

There is a fairly recent recommendaton that women at high risk for breast cancer (and obviously, if you've had it, you're at high risk) should get a breast MRI each year in addition to a mammogram. Both my oncologist and surgeon encouraged me to do so, we got that arranged. There are three places I could have gone -- Denver, which is about an 8 hour drive; Salina, about 90 minutes; or Wichita, about 3 hours. My doctors suggested either Denver or Wichita, because the recommendation says the facility should be able to do a biopsy in case something is found (and the MRI machine here isn't that good, my oncologist said). That left me with the impression that the MRI would be examined once it's done, and if there was something questionable, you'd get further examination and maybe a biopsy while there.

But when we were making the appointment, my surgeon's office manager mentioned that they "wouldn't be able to do it the same day." I thought that was kind of strange, but they already had all my info, so I didn't say anything. So this morning, I got up way early, left before dawn and was in Wichita in plenty of time. The MRI itself took a little over half an hour, and I was in the facility for maybe an hour and a half total. As I was getting dressed to leave, one of the techs said I would get the results "in a day or two" from my doctor.

So this just has me wondering if it's really worth it to drive six hours for maybe an hour and a half of my time, when it's a great big IF wether or not there will be anything to be concerned about. Why not just drive to the facility that's 90 minutes away -- even if they can't do the biopsy -- when I'd just have to make another appointment and another trip IF the Wichita facility found something? If my doctors had found something and the biopsy would be a sure thing and could be done the same day -- and the whole procedure couldn't be done at or closer to home -- then I wouldn't have a problem with making that trip. But just for an annual, routine procedure? Yeah, that's a problem. It takes me a day away from work, and driving that much sucks my energy -- not to mention gas (and at over $3 a gallon, that's a BIG dea).

I'll bring this up at my next support group meeting. I know a couple of others have had it done also, so I'll see what they think. And next year, I'll mention I'd prefer to go closer to home. Or maybe suggest the local hospital work on getting a new MRI.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Sick sick sick

I'm tired of it. Being sick, that is. A week ago, I came down with a cold that had some kind of vendetta. Sore throat, stuffy and painful sinuses, runny nose, bad cough ... blech. I slept most of that day until I had to go to work at the hotline. Didn't go to either job Monday, and suffered through Wednesday, when I worked both jobs. I was supposed to work Thursday and Friday nights, too, but fortunately we have a new hotline assistant, and she wanted to start ASAP, so the boss asked if I wouldn't mind letting her have those nights. I was too glad to have that opportunity! I don't think I'd be in near as good as a shape if I had worked those three nights in a row -- and I'm still not in too great a shape!

I am feeling much better though, and have managed to catch up on the housework I hadn't been able to get to. You can actually see the countertops in the kitchen now, and I have clean clothes! I still have to catch up on about three rooms' worth of cleaning, but I don't work too many weeknights this week, so I think I'll be able to manage.

I did get some bad news about one of my support group members last week. She went into the hospital after some vomiting and bad headaches. They found two small tumors in her brain, for which she's geting radiation now. Someone who went to visit her said she is in great spirits, though, and looking forward to getting on with life, so that's good news. The hospital here lets you send e-mails to patients through their Web site (volunteers print them out, paste them into a card and deliver them to the person), so I sent her message since I probably shouldn't go in to a place with sick people when I have a bad cold. I'm hoping she does well, because she was another who was diagnosed around the same time I was. This will be her third time around with treatment. Go, Gina! You can beat it again!

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Snow day

Well, a half day, at least. When I woke up this morning, there was already about 3 inches covering the ground. The snow wasn't as heavy in the town where I work, but it kept up all day (and blowing), and when I got home about 1:30 this afternoon, there was probably about 7 inches on the ground here. I had scooped a path on the back patio to the garage before I left for work, and when I got home, you couldn't tell I'd done that.

Before I got settled in and cozy inside, I scooped paths in back and up front, not that you can tell now, and decided to put out some more birdseed. The birds did not want to leave the feeders, though, and one little female finch wouldn't get off the thistle feeder until I nudged her a few times with my finger! I've gotten within a couple feet of the feeders before they fly off sometimes, but never have I ever been able to walk right up to the feeder, let alone touch a wild bird!

I tried my mom's chili recipe for the first time today (after she FINALLY she gave me the recipe). I browned the meat Sunday and tossed it and the other ingredients in the slowcooker this morning. It tasted just as good as when she makes it, I thought, but I'll take some to Dad tomorrow (after the snow dies down) and see if he thinks it's just as good as what he calls Mom's "damn good chili." I filled up on that and cornbread muffins this afternoon, and had popcorn for dinner. Hey, it's a snow day, I can indulge!

Looks like I need to get a dog door in pronto. Mom is off on her next adventure, so Buster has some long days by himself when I'm working the hotline on a weekday. I hate leaving him alone, but I thought I could wait until spring to put in a dog door (since you're supposed to take the door off its hinges to install one) and in the meantime, Dad could come over and let him out on those long days.

Buster's timid around strangers, especially men, but I thought he was used to Dad by now and would be OK. We tried it Sunday, when I worked an 8-hour shift on the hotline, but Dad said Buster would not go out for him. He greeted Dad at the door, but went right into my bedroom and wouldn't come out. So I guess Operation Dog Door gets moved up. It's supposed to warm up toward the weekend, so maybe I can get something done soon.

I fixed my shower door! One of the rollers had come out on one of the sliding doors last week, so I have just kind of avoided using it. Once I got a look at it today, though, and saw what needed to be done, it didn't take very long. It was simple, but I'm kind of proud of myself and feeling all handy. Not that I'm going to go put in a dog door right now or anything.