On turning 40

Today I turned 40. Five years ago, I would have said I dreaded that thought. But then, three and a half years ago, something happened. I found a lump in my left breast. It was cancer.

There are cancer survivors who say getting cancer was a blessing. Not to belittle anyone's beliefs, but I think they're crazy. It was hell. And not just for me. My family, my friends, my co-workers all also carried a part of what I went through.

But I got through it. Hell, I kicked its ass.

This year, I've come to realize just how lucky I really was. Lucky I found it when I did, because I never did regular self-exams and didn't think I'd need to go for a mammogram for a few more years. Lucky I'm in a place with a great cancer center and doctors. And lucky I have so many great people around me. It is in, in part, because of them I am here, celebrating 40 years.

So to my family and friends, thank you. Even if you couldn't be here while I was going through my treatment, I felt your support and good thoughts and prayers. And your e-mails and cards got me through some tough days. And to my co-workers who stepped up when I couldn't quite keep up the normal work load or just gave me an ear or even a shoulder to cry on.

And of course, to Nipper, my buddy, who didn't understand what was going on, but was always ready to curl up with me and comfort me.

This year, I have felt better than I have in years -- even before the cancer. The fatigue is gone, the chemo brain is gone. And it's not just a physical difference. It just feels like there are a whole lot of possibilities out there within my reach and all I need to do is grab them. And I will.

Cancer was not a blessing. But it did open my eyes to a lot of things over the last few years. One of those is that there are a lot of great people in my life, and that no matter what I might face in the years ahead, they'll be there to support me. I hope I can be as much to them as they have been to me.

Thanks, all. Here's to the next 40!

Long live journalism?

The Detroit Media Partnership, which publishes the Detroit Free Press and the Detroit News, announced big changes are coming in how it publishes. Next spring, the newspapers will deliver print editions to homes only on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays, their biggest advertising days. They will still print daily, but the remaining days of the week, the size of the print edition will be drastically reduced and will only be available at newsstands. The papers will push online delivery of the news over print.

I can't say that I'm shocked to see this coming, but it makes me pretty sad. However, I think it could well be the most workable business model for newspapers to come along. It certainly makes more sense than cutting your staffs to nothing and cutting budgets so that the reporters and photographers who remain can barely leave the building to cover the news.

Fact is, this writing has been on the wall for a long time; newspapers just refused to believe it. Or maybe averted their eyes. Yes, there is still an audience for print — and I think to some extent there always will be — but it is literally dying. I think that those who are in the early 20s and teens now are likely going to be the last generation to see print newspapers have much of a role in society. There will always be those small-town or neighborhood weeklies and specialty publications, I think, but the bigger papers (even ones like the small daily I work for) have to face that in order to survive, they've got to emphasize online. Home delivery of a print newspaper will, for them, become something "extra," an offering to those who can afford the luxury of sitting at home in their pjs reading the paper while the rest of us rush around with a job or two, or kids to rush to school, or whatever we do to get by while we hear the news on radio or browse on PDAs or cell phones or whatever we'll have in the future.

Our product has never been a piece of paper. It has been delivery of information, wether it be in advertising, articles or opinion. That can be done in many different media. Few papers took broadcasting seriously as competition, fewer still looked at the Internet that way. A very few did, and even embraced that competition. What the Freep is doing is quite likely the next step we have to take to keep delivering our true product.

Lights!

I've got the outdoor Christmas lights on finally. I put them up a week ago, I think, and just now got around to getting them plugged in. Because you know, you have to do it strategically ... what gets plugged into what outlet and so on. I didn't put up as much as I have in the past. I have enough lights to line the front of the roof and around the porch, but the lights I got a few years back, which I really REALLY loved, they, of course, do not make any more. So replacing them is the pits. And it's a lot of work to put them up.

But last year, on the after Christmas sale, I got some blue net lights for the shrubs next to the porch and a couple red rope lights. I debated about winding them up the porch poles, but hated to think about how to plug everything in. So I wound them around the split-rail fence next to the driveway, and I think it looks OK. I put up the cheap, plastic red ribbons on the fence posts. I have plenty of those so if the weather trashes them, I can replace them pretty easy. I might buy more of the rope lights after Christmas again this year and eventually wind it all the way down the fence ... which is actually quite a ways.

I might get to the tree later tonight. It's just a fake tree, and we'd always kept the lights on it when we put it away so every year we just had to straighten it out and put the decorations on it. But I also need to do some housecleaning and some laundry, so we'll see. Plus, I had a pretty busy day, so it'd be nice to just crash for a bit, too.

Talking to the future

Today I talked with a beginning newswriting class at the local university. It's taught by a professor I had when I was there, although I had that class before she started there. She has her class submit stories to the newspaper I work for as part of their assignments and I had edited some of their stories for us to use, so I offered to give them some feedback. I was able to take about an hour to talk to them -- all four of them.

A couple of the students were late, and so was the prof, so I chatted with one of the students while we waited. And when I did start talking to the class, I gave them he basic rundown of my job and offered some feedback to a couple of the students' stories, explaining why we made the kinds of changes we did.

They had some good questions, too, asking about the paper, the kinds of things I thought they should be learning considering the kinds of changes going on journalism, etc. It was kinda fun, really, and it's nice to know there are some younger people still interested in what makes journalism good and not just getting their name and their friends' names in the paper.

You were looking for what?

It always amuses me to check out my blog stats. Yes, I have a counter, and I like checking out how people find my blog. A lot are from friends and family, since I used it to keep people updated on how I was doing during my cancer treatment. But I also get a lot of hits from people who must just be ... weird.

It seems like the current most popular search terms people hit on my site with have to do with this entry, about finding out how I could easily finish my bachelor's degree after 21 years by taking two classes. People are seriously searching for "how to get a bachelor's degree in ..." two days, a week, a month, six months, you name it.

Then there's the recent hit on "how to buy a giant pink Serta sheep." You gotta earn one of those, pal. Buy a mattress in October and you'll get a small one.

I've recently seen searches for "Christina Applegate nude naked porn" lately. Get a life and get out of your parents' basement, OK?

Occasionally, I get hits from people searching for something about Mark Harmon's hairy chest. Only thing I can think of is that this entry about TV and this one — both from the same month — are drawing them in. I'm sure people have been quite disappointed it was my own hairy chest I was talking about.

There is a more serious side. This one, where I talk about the side effects of Novelbine, one of the chemo drugs I had, gets a lot of hits. That was a nasty time, and I'm glad it didn't have to last long. Hope that what I wrote in there might help someone else with their treatment.

Long overdue update

Can't believe it's been almost a month and a half since I posted. There's been lots going on, really.

Being a journalist, I guess I'll start with the biggest news. Mom has moved out of the house. It had been frustrating lately, probably for both of us, and after she returned from her last trip, she moved into the house she bought for my dad to live in when I was starting my cancer treatment. I guess they figured since they didn't kill each other on that trip, they'd be OK. And I'm getting along OK, finding a groove to get into to keep things running smoothly. I hate leaving Buster alone so much, but Mom still goes over to do her laundry and such, so he gets some playtime with her.

The other big news would be that I finally found a second part-time job. It's at the local mall, on the mall maintenance staff. It's a pretty easy job, mainly because it's not that big of a mall. Although we'll see what I think after working by myself tonight, "Black Friday." The Penney's store is staying open until 11 p.m.!

What else? Oh, yeah, I was a model in the Day of Caring back in October:

I don't get all made up ... uh, ever, so this is a rare sight. I ended up buying the outfit, except for the boots, which cost almost as much as the rest of it put together. And in the goodie bag I got for modeling was a little stuffed Serta sheep. Buster stole it out of the bag and made it his. I had to cut the eyeballs off so he wouldn't and choke on them.

That's about it for now. I'll do more later, but I've got to head to work soon, and while writing this I'm also chatting with a friend. Talk about multitasking!

Rain, rain, go away

We've had more than four inches of rain since Saturday. For this area, that's a lot. I mean a LOT. I came home to discover the roof had been leaking in the kitchen. Not too much, but it was still a mess to clean up. It's been dripping off and on all evening.

Poor Buster didn't get his walk today, and he probably didn't go out much during the day since it just POURED much of the day. We roughhoused on the floor for awhile, and played with his favorite squeaky toy, a turkey. It's actually the only toy of his I can find anymore. He's sort of buried it in the back yard a few times over the last couple weeks, and I have no idea where his other squeaky toy, a shoe, is. Probably in the same place where his Kong is. We haven't seen that since shortly after he got it at Christmas.

Buster's not a snuggly dog like Nipper was, but he has his times when he wants to be close. I'm learning to "read" when he wants that. He'll kind of bug me if I'm lying on my couch, but he's not interested in playing. So when I scoot over and pat the couch, he'll hop up next to me and curl up for a nap. He doesn't put his head on my lap or anything, but once he's up there, he relaxes. He still sleeps out in the living room when it's time to go to bed, though.

Other than the rain, there's not a heck of a lot going on. So here's hoping we dry out the rest of the week.

Busterversary

Today marked one year since Buster came home. We had a pretty good day. In the morning I finished up some yardwork that I started last night but had to quit since it's getting dark earlier. I wanted to get that out of the way, because a friend of mine -- the one whose wedding I went to a couple weeks ago -- was in town and came over for awhile, and plus I wanted the afternoon to do something special with Buster.

So Karen and I had a good time visiting and catching up, and Buster was a pretty good boy. He got a bit overexcited a few times and nipped at her -- playfully, but I still don't like when he does that. But overall he behaved. Then in the afternoon, I took Buster into town and we spent about an hour walking through the big park. I think he had fun, even though it was pretty cool and kind of rainy. He's sure tired out tonight, so we're just hanging out at home with the TV, some popcorn and brownies.

Some busy weekends are coming up, though. Next Saturday is the Day of Caring, a brunch and fashion show for breast cancer awareness. All the models are breast cancer survivors. And yes, this year I'll be modeling. I was a bit nervous because the store they picked for me is a western wear store, and I am NOT into the cowgirl thing. But I did find some cool stuff, and I hope to have some pix to post here afterwards.

The weekend after that is a copy editing conference in Wichita -- yes, back to Wichita. I've been there more in the last year than I have in my whole life. But I'm looking forward to it. It'll be nice to be around people who actually think copy editing is still important to newspapers.

Lookee what the mailman brung ...

OK, you'll have to wait to look, since I don't have a digital camera with me, but when I got home today, there was a big express mail envelope in the mailbox, with a return address from the local university. And when I opened it up, inside was ... my Bachelor of General Studies diploma! And a tassel! They even spelled my name right!

It's a little more awesome than I woulda thunk.

Good weekend

Buster and I are both back home after our weekend. Buster had a good report from his vet's visit, except for his weight. He's about 15 pounds over what he should be, the vet said. She said I could cut down on the amount of food I give him, so he's gradually going on smaller rations today. And maybe we'll go for a bit longer walk every day. Buster seems to be happy to be home. I'm glad he's home, too.

My weekend was pretty good. I survived driving through Wichita traffic -- not a bad feat for a small-town girl. Although we did get to know the Oliver loop to Kellogg pretty well. Seems we kept taking the wrong turn onto Kellogg, but with all that construction going on, it was hard navigate. We got lost only once, on the way to the reception, and were about an hour late, but there was still plenty of food. And we weren't the only ones who had a hard time finding the place downtown. But it was worth it to be able to see Karen & Eric get to celebrate and how happy they were.

And Vanessa Peters was great Friday night. Not too many of the people there were there specifically to see her -- and it was Oktoberfest -- so the crowd was a bit rowdy. A fight even broke out at one point, but overall it was enjoyable. I got to talk to her and her guitarist, Manuel, before the show and during a break, and during another break she sat and talked with a group of college kids (mostly Chinese students) who seemed to be there more for the music than the booze, which was cool. She's got some albums available on iTunes, if you're interested.

Back to work tomorrow. Hopefully, it won't be as tough a week as the last one.

Dogless

That's what I am until Sunday evening. I'm heading to Wichita tomorrow morning with a co-worker for a friend's wedding, and we're staying overnight Saturday, so Buster is staying in a "cabin" at his vet's for the weekend. I can go pick him up Sunday evening, so depending on what time we get back, Sunday will be a quiet day.

Tonight, I'll have something to distract me for awhile. I'm heading into town to see Vanessa Peters and one of her bandmates perform at the local brewpub. I've been bored with commercial radio, and got tired of hearing the same old stuff on my iPod, so I started searching for different music. I checked out the Web sites of the local venues one day, and found she was coming here, listened to stuff on her MySpace page, and kinda got hooked. And then I thought it might be fun to write about some of the music going on around here and pitched the idea to my boss. He was less than enthusiastic about it, but I went ahead and did an article on Peters anyway for our arts page this week. I'd like to do more, especially on the local acts. We'll see how it works out time-wise with all the other crap that gets heaped on me at work now. I'm kind of hoping to maybe branch out into some freelance writing with some of this, too.

On my way to the show, I need to drop off Hope, my support group's giant pink Serta sheep mascot, at the home of one of the members so she can ride on the Homecoming parade float tomorrow. I'm kind of sorry I'll be missing that, because it's always a great experience. I've done it twice now, and each time, got a little choked up when people stand and applaud us as we go by. All we did was survive. It was all the scientists, doctors, nurses and caretakers who made that possible. They're really the ones who deserve the applause. So if you're involved at all in cancer research, oncologoy or are helping a loved one through treatment, know that applause is really for YOU.

Best. Compliment. Ever

I was sitting at my desk this morning, when Joe, one of our ad sales people who's around my age, passed by. Pointing at his thinning hair, he said to me "If I had hair, that's exactly what I'd want it to look like."

Awesome.

More on Christina Applegate

Christina Applegate, who was diagnosed recently with breast cancer after an MRI, talked more about her diagnosis and treatment yesterday on Good Morning America (you can watch the whole interview with another BC survivor, Robin Roberts here)

She opted to have both breasts removed -- no doubt a difficult decision, especially considering Hollywood's fixation on how people look -- after testing positive for the BRCA1 gene. Fortunately, I tested negative for mutation on both the BRCA1 and BRCA 2 genes, but when my oncologist first discussed the testing with me, she said if I tested positive, she would likely recommend removal of the breasts as well as my uterus and ovaries as prevention against any more cancer. So, a tough decision, but what do you do when it's your life you're talking about?

I really applaud her desire to help other women pay for MRIs and the genetic testing. The MRI is recommended for women at high risk, but not all insurance companies cover it yet. And the gene testing costs about $3,000. A co-worker of mine who's in her 20 or 30s has a big family history of BC, and while the insurance company will pay for her annual mammograms, they won't pay for the gene test unless she or one of her sisters is diagnosed with cancer. That's just nuts.

And big applause to Applegate for going on TV and talking about her cancer, only three weeks after her surgery. At times, she appeared pretty emotional, and I'm sure she's still trying to sort things out in her own head. Having to do that on national TV couldn't have made it any easier. She's a good representative for what many women with breast cancer have had to face.

All clear

The scoping went well. There's a just some diverticulitis, but no polyps, no tumors, no nothing. He didn't even take any samples. So whoo-hoo!

And it wasn't all that bad. I was out within a few minutes of the IV starting and don't remember a thing until I woke up in the recovery area. I did get to see the few pictures he took. The nurse in the recovery room was pretty funny, too. During the colonoscopy, the doc fills you up with air, so you have to pass that before they let you go. So as I let one rip, the nurse said "Good! That's what we like to hear .... nurses are kind of gross."

After Mom and I left the surgical center, we got a big lunch and got home around 1 p.m. I slept until nearly 5 p.m. I'm still kind of groggy and just hanging out on the couch with the laptop, much to Buster's disappointment. Poor guy didn't get his walk this morning, and all I've done while here has been to sleep. Maybe later this evening I'll feel up to playing with him and take him for a walk if it's not too warm. Until then, I'm not going far from the couch.

So hungry

So tomorrow is the colonoscopy. That means tonight, no food, other than Jell-O. And nothing red or purple, because that can apparantly cause some discoleration in your innerds. I was allowed to eat a light breakfast, but nothing but liquids and Jell-O after that. I did OK, really, until this afternoon, when I had to put together the food page for the paper. And then a co-worker came in and starting munching on the Chees-its she keeps in her desk and another came in with Chinese take-out.

Now I'm just sitting here on the couch waiting for the colon cleanser to start working. It's not going to be a fun evening. Maybe by the time the doc lets me go tomorrow, I'll feel good enough for a big BIG lunch somewhere.

Oops. I think the stuff is starting to work. It's about time for the first of many trips to the bathroom.

Hmmm, what's been happening?

Gee not much lately. Except ... I GOT MY PORT OUT!

It was last Tuesday. I guess I've been too psyched about it to write about it here, but the port-a-cath is now gone, just shy of three years to the day I got it put in. It's a pretty awesome feeling. I think it's the first time I looked forward to going to the hospital.

It was done with just a local anaesthetic in the afternoon, but you know, my boss didn't need to know that, so I took the whole day off! And that was after having Monday off for working Saturday, so I had a bit of a mini-vacation.

Anyway, there is a bit of a scar, but that will fade with time, just like the first one did. It hurt for only a day or so, and I feel a pull once in a while, but it's getting better. It just feels great to have it gone. It is, as one of my support group members said last night about getting hers out, like a graduation. I graduated from cancer!

On the bitter side of things, though, the second job is gone, thanks to the Legislature not providing the money for social services that everyone was counting on. The hotline has been automated, and the three of us working it got laid off. There's been some other people who got laid off too, from what I understand, and they've had to make a lot of other budget cuts. It's pretty sad, really, because the organization does a lot of good for people who need some help.

Anyway, that's the big news. Later.

Christina Applegate

She's been diagnosed with breast cancer. She's 36, the same age I was when I was diagnosed. Her mother is a two-time BC survivor, so it seems Applegate's been taking the advised precautions of mammograms and sonograms for early detection. And that says a lot — doesn't matter if you've got a family history or not, women should be doing whatever they can. I didn't, and it really scares me to think what might have happened if I hadn't accidentally felt that lump when I did.

So, no matter your age, do a self-exam monthly. If you're between 35 and 40, get a mammogram — this can be used as a baseline to compare your future mammograms to, which you should have every year once you're 40. If you're at high risk, talk to your doctor about also getting sonograms or an MRI, too.

I had it pretty "easy" with my treatment, in part because it was found fairly early. But I've seen what this disease can do, and it doesn't care how old you are, if you have children, if you're married or not, or what you've accomplished — or could yet do — with your life. Since I joined my support group, we've lost 4 members to cancer, and another is fighting for her life. So don't screw around with your chances.

I love it

Before:

And after:

Randy Pausch

Randy Pausch, a terminally ill professor whose earnest farewell lecture at Carnegie Mellon University became an Internet phenomenon and bestselling book that turned him into a symbol for living and dying well, died Friday. He was 47

Roadshow pic

Finally, here's our pic from the Antiques Roadshow (I think they caught me before I was really ready):

A nice end to the day

Man, I'm stuffed. Mom & I are back from having dinner at Stroud's, not too far from the campground. They're known for their pan-fried chicken, and man, was it good. I ate way too much, though, and feel like I can't move.

The afternoon was pretty rainy, so we kind of waited it out until about 3:30, then went to Botanica, which has about two dozen different gardens. It was really pretty amazing. They didn't have their fountains going because Wichita is having some kind of water problem, but the grounds are really beautiful. They seem to really like lantana, which Mom does too. She has several in the front garden at home along the sidewalk. It was neat to pick up some ideas of what else I could plant at home, too. We got rained on a bit, but it also was nice and cool to stroll the gardens.

We'll head home sometime in the morning. It's been a nice break from the routine.

That was fast

Well, our "Antiques Roadshow" experience is over. It's really pretty fast and efficient the way they have it set up. Our ticket entry time was 8 a.m., although we went early, getting to there about 7:15 (in the pouring rain) or so, and we were done by 8:30. I imagine that later in the day, you probably end up waiting a lot more, though, as they had the place set up so lines could wind around and around and around before you get to the actual appraisal area.

I took the sketchbook of the African safari, and the appraiser was real interested in it, but she also had a time making out the artist's signature. She had a laptop to look up information, and found someone who might be the artist, but that's not 100 percent certain, since she couldn't compare the signatures on the computer images too well with what was on the book. But she liked the detail of the work in the book, and appraised it at a decent number. Not enough to quit my job, or even pay off the car if I wanted to sell it (which I don't), but it gives me an idea.

She also looked at Mom's watercolor painting, and she really liked that. She conferred with another appraiser, and for a moment I thought they might want to put her TV with it, but it didn't turn out that way. Mom also had some family jewelry looked at, and that turned out about the way she thought, she said. So no big surprise treasures for us, but we had a good time.

The local PBS station was there, and we had our photo taken. They'll have that available for download late next week, so check back Thursday or Friday to see! And I won an Antiques Roadshow tour T-shirt!

Afterwards, we walked around Wichita's Old Town for awhile and had breakfast at a little soda fountain/cafe that's been there since the early 30s. It's ironic we have to go east to Wichita to find a good dish with New Mexico green chiles. Now we're just crashing in the camper and maybe we'll do something later on.

Three years and counting

Today was another in my six-month checkups with my oncologist. And everything is pretty good. The X-ray and mammo are good, and my blood test was "perfect," she said. I did discuss with her the fact I seem to have had an upset stomach more often than usual for the past month or so, and she decided I should have one more exam -- a colonoscopy. Yeah, fun times ahead! Oh, I did get a rectal exam while there too. That was OK. Well, the results were OK, the procedure wasn't something to look forward to.

When I got back to work, I told my co-workers who were there everything was good, but a couple of them were out for the afternoon, so we still need to do our celebratory ice cream run. I see my surgeon tomorrow, but that should go well, too, so maybe we'll do it afterwards.

I checked on my blog at work, because I knew it was close to when I first found out I had cancer. I was thinking it was the 18th. But it's not. It was today. Three years ago this afternoon, I got my biopsy, and Dr. K said she could tell with near-certainty that it was cancer. It hit me hard, reading that blog entry again. I had to step outside for a bit, in fact. Three years. And I'm doing fine.

All right!

Rock in America

Almost forgot about the best part of my July 4 weekend. Night Ranger played in concert here Thursday night, and it was totally awesome! They weren't the biggest band of the 80s, but I had forgotton just how many good songs they really had (and of course, as soon as I got home I downloaded their greatest hits album). And they still put on a great show, even if Jack Blades seems to like the sound of his own voice. Forgot the comedy, man, and just play the music.

They did a terrific version of "Goodbye," first introducing the piano player, Chicago's Christian Matthew Cullen, who played a few minutes of blues, and then went into the song, with Kelly Keagy on the vocals, accompanied through most of it by just the piano. And then BAM! the rest of the band joined in full-force for the end. Great work on a great song. I don't know that I cared that much for the one new song they played off their new album "Hole in the Sun." And on the video screens they had some weird animated dancing robots that without any kind of context didn't make much sense.

Best of the night had to be their best-known song, "Sister Christian," which of course they saved for the encore. I was sitting about midway through the seating area and you could easily hear the audience singing along through the whole thing. They finished off the night with "You Can Still Rock in America." Overall, it was better than I expected. A lot of times at this festival, they get the "old washed-up rock stars tour," but these guys are far above that.

Oh, and the guitarist, Brad Gillis? Damn hot. He was walking through the crowd before the show and was about 10 feet away from me several times. I didn't realize who he was until he was onstage, though; I just thought he was another guy on the crew because the guy he was walking around with had "roadie" written all over him. If only I'd known.

Some updates

Did a little updating around here today. And everytime I try to change or add to my quotes of the day, the code gets screwed up. I messed around with it for a couple hours this afternoon, and couldn't figure it out, so for now, it's going to stay blank. If any of you know anything about javascript feel free to take a look at the source code and tell me where I screwed up, cause I sure as hell can't see it.

I added a blogroll to the right-hand column, too. There's some I like to read for health information and various tips and tricks about life and work. Karen is a former co-worker/friend who recently quit the newspaper to follow her own path (go, Karen!) ... oh, and she's marrying that Erik guy in the title of their blog. And then there's my mom's travel blog. She only posts when she's on the road, and that won't be for awhile, but you can catch up on her past couple of trips.

Kriss Carr did the documentary "Crazy Sexy Cancer," in which she takes you along on her journey after finding out she has an incurable form of cancer. It aired on TLC and is available on DVD. You should check it out, if you haven't seen it. Diablo Cody is the Oscar-winning writer of the movie "Juno" (which one of these days, I'll get around to commenting on). Her blog just rocks. Julia Sweeney you might remember from "Saturday Night Live" some years back. She's got some new and different projects. And she had cancer, too.

Then there's a few journalism blogs I like to read (although they're somewhat depressing these days). Most are about copy editing. Best among them are Common Sense Journalism, Blogslot and You Don't Say (I worship John McIntyre). Then there's also a couple of colleagues I keep in touch with. Scott Aust is a contributor to the Rapid City Journal's Mount Blogmore, and Down the Road is Joy Leiker's blog of her coverage area for the Muncie, Ind., newspaper.

Anyway, that's the updates. Hope to get those quotes working again before long.

I are a college graduate!

Just took the online quizzes for the field trip classes I took this last week to finish out a bachelor of general studies degree. And I passed. Looks like I've got a degree.

Or I will come May, since there's only one graduation a year.

Classes are done!

Well, I'm on my way to finishing my degree. On Sunday and today, I took the two one-hour credit geology field trips to finish out my bachelor's degree as a Bachelor of General Studies. All I have to do is take the quizzes online (I'll probably do that tomorrow) and score at least 60%, which should be pretty easy.

The classes were actually fun. Today's was a trip to sites across the northern part of the county, and it was interesting to learn about where I live. I'll probably look at everything differently now that I know more about the different types of rocks and minerals we have here and how and when they were formed. The previous trip was to a nearby reservoir. There we learned about some of the older types of rock formations and also stopped at the site of a sinkhole that has caused problems along the interstate over the years.

It really is pretty country, too. Everyone thinks Kansas is really flat, but those are the folks probably seeing it just from the interstate or the air. Get on the back roads, and there's some rugged, beautiful sites. One place we went to today was probably one of the highest points in the county. You could stand on the hill and see miles and miles of green hills and pastures and big, open sky.

After this, then what? I'm not entirely sure yet. Graduate school's still a possibility, but I need to find out some more info. I do need something different, though, because I just can't say I feel all that secure about my job. I'm almost certain that, at best, in three years my job won't be there. After all, who needs a page designer if there's just not as many pages to design? I really don't see newspapers the size I'm working at continuing to be published on a daily basis on paper. Online, sure, but you don't need a lot of people to put a Web site together, once it's there. So I guess I'm in search of something new. Just wish I knew what it was!

So long, George

I was really shocked this morning when I heard this morning that George Carlin had died. I mean, yeah, he was 71, but he just seemed like one of those people who would always be around, someone bigger than life. Someone this world needed. Maybe it's because I became a fan at an early age, when we got HBO when I was around 9 and he was already a huge name. I quickly got hooked on all the comedy specials and would stay up late on weekends and during the summers to watch them again and again and again and again.

It wasn't just the "dirty" stuff that appealed to me. Most especially with Carlin, it was how he was able to pick out the absurdities of life, our language and our world. And no one group was off-limits to him. He made me think. I didn't always agree with what he said, and didn't always like what he said, but I was always amazed that he just came out and said it. And I always laughed.

So have a few laughs, courtesy of the late, great genius:

Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.

The very existence of flamethrowers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, "You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done."

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

And there's some excellent clips of his routines here. "Feminist Blowjob" is one of the best.

New photos

Butterfly weed 6-08.JPG
Originally uploaded by junogle.

Took a few pictures around the garden this morning. Here's the butterfly weed that took hold under the pecan tree last year. It's really doing well there, along with the hosta. And out front, Mom's poker plants are looking just incredible -- so many blooms!

What a weekend

Ever read about someone who survived a hit by a tornado, and they say "It sounded like a freight train"?

It sure does.

Friday night, two tornadoes hit my little town. There wasn't a lot of serious damage, and no really serious injuries, but it was awful scary.

The storms started building up to our southwest, with reports of rotation and funnel clouds, along with heavy rain and large hail. Mom and I got our "storm shelter" prepared. I put that in quotes because our best shelter here at the house is probably one of our closets -- walk-in with no windows, and somewhat centrally located. So we put the computers, some valuables and blankets in there, along with Buster's leash. We already have a storage bin filled with emergency supplies, and I have a battery operated radio.

Then the TV and radio people announced there was a confirmed tornado at the nearby reservoir. It's about 8 miles away as the crow -- or tornado -- flies, so we knew it was time to get in the closet and shut the door. It was just a bit cramped in there with Mom, Buster and I. We kept the TV in my bedroom on since they were giving better information. The first reports said the tornado should be at our town at about 8:07 -- giving us about 20 minutes warning. Then they kept pushing it back -- 8:11, 8:14. The rain was falling hard, and there was some small hail. We heard the TV weather man say the tornado should be right over town as he was speaking, but it hadn't reached us yet.

And there was another one behind it.

Then everything went black.

Mom turned on the lamp we had with us and we listened to the radio -- the tornado had been spotted 4 miles southeast of town and was heading right for us (and we live on the southwest edge of town!).

Then it got quiet. The rain stopped. The wind stopped.

And then we heard it. A wooshing noise, like a wind I'd never heard before. It wasn't the throbbing, chugging sound of a freight train, but it had that same dopplar kind of effect, starting quiet and then increasing in intensity. We pulled the blankets over our heads and held onto each and Buster. There was a big THUD against the roof. Then another and another, and the whole house began to shake.

And then it began to fade. We pulled the blankets off of us and tried to breathe a sigh of relief, but it was getting hot. The closet, at least, was all in one piece and we were OK. We didn't quite dare just yet to open the door. We knew the second tornado was on its way. We waiting and listened to the radio for a bit longer.

And then it started again, about 10 or 15 minutes later. Just like before, the total silence. The sound of a big, swirling wind growing closer. Debris thudding against the roof. And then the wind fading.

We waited a few more minutes before we dared to open the door. I was afraid we'd look out my bedroom window and through the lightning flashes see all the trees behind my yard stripped and mangled. But they made it through OK.

We lost one of the willow trees along the creek, and a couple big branches off the old cottonwood, but for the most part, everything was OK. One of the garage doors got bowed out slightly, but it still opens OK. Mom took off to go check on dad and the house and her camper. All were OK.

The neighborhood was mostly OK, too. Al, who lives next door to me, lost his flagpole. A neighbor down the street did have a large tree in their backyard uprooted. It fell on their shed, knocking the carport down on their car. The tree took down some power lines in the alley, but of course power was already out, so no fire danger.

People were coming out of their houses, and we compared notes. It's kind of odd that it takes something like this to bond with your neighbors. We got to know a bit more about those people we just kind of said hi to in passing. At least if this happens again, we know we can run across the street to a neighbor's basement.

Morning came and we took a bit more of an assessment of the damage. Just the willow trees are down, and they didn't really damage anything. I noticed in the afternoon the neighbors had gotten their car out from under the carport after the tree was removed, so it must not have taken too much damage. The high school had a big hole in the roof over the gym, and a house across the street from the school lost a small cinder-block garage. Some windows were blown out across town, and a barn less than a mile north of my house had its roof blown off. The metal roof blew across the street, knocking down the power poles and lines that are a main supply of electricity to town. And crews were out working on it by mid-morning.

Saturday, Mom, Dad and I went into town to get breakfast. Mom had to work, so Dad and I got some ice for the ice chests and a few things to eat, then headed back home and drove around and looked at some of the damage. So was everyone else, of course. That's what you do in a small town. There was a steady flow of traffic to the city's tree limb burn site, with pickups and trailers just full of branches and even tree trunks. I ended up writing a story and taking a few pictures for the paper I work for, then had to work at the hotline from 5 to 10. It was very eerie driving into town when there were very few lights on. On the edge of town, the city's new water plant and the assisted living center next to it both had generators, and the co-op gas station a block down the road did too, and here and there a house with a generator had a light or there were candles flickering in windows, but otherwise it was black and silent.

Sunday, I had to work the hotline from 9 to 5, and Dad called in the early afternoon to tell me the power had been back on for a couple hours. Hooray! But as the afternoon went on, the sky got darker. And yes, we went through it again. This time, no tornado hit town, but there was one spotted north of the town I live in. The co-worker who was to relieve me at 5 p.m. came in about an hour early, just as the storm hit with rain and some hail. She had been out on the golf course and they chased off the golfers because of the lightning, so she came to the office a bit early. We kept our eye on the TV reports of the weather, and listened to the tornado sirens going off, but never had to go for shelter. I stayed about an hour late until the worst of it had passed, and got home about 6:30. Poor Buster seemed pretty happy to see me. I'd been pretty worried about him since storms make him nervous. I was worried about Dad, too, but I was able to talk to him, and I knew he was keeping an eye on things. By the time I got home, I was just exhausted. Fortunately, today I have the whole day off. I'm going to enjoy it. As long as it doesn't cloud up too much.

Here's some pictures I took Saturday:
This is a panoramic shot of the creek at my house Saturday. The willow trees, to the far left, used to lean out over the creek. And all the trees on my side are normally a couple feet above the water level.

A county worker uses a backhoe to remove the trees and limbs that had piled up against the bridge near my house. I woke about 4 a.m. Saturday morning to hear a lot of cracking and crashing. I don't know if it was this stuff hitting the bridge or a tree upstream falling.

The dam at our city lake. Normally, it's probably about 20 feet to the water level on the downstream side of the dam.

This guy lost his garage. This is on the other side of town from where I live, near the high school.

Catch up

So, where to begin? A lot has really been happening.

• Mom and I will be going to Wichita in July for "Antiques Roadshow"! She got tickets and we can each take two items. She's taking a painting she inherited and some jewelry, and I'm taking a sketchbook of an African safari and ... something else. More on this as it draws nearer.
• Buster doesn't seem to like to swim. I had to haul him out of the creek Sunday after he jumped in after some people going by in canoes. He chased them downstream a ways, into the trees on the neighbor's property. He found a good spot to dive in -- and I think he didn't expect it to be as deep as it was -- but then he couldn't find a spot to climb back up out of the creek. So I had to make my way through the trees to where he was and pull him out. It was hard not to laugh at him, even though he was obviously a bit scared of the predicament he'd gotten himself into. Still, he did go in the creek today (in the shallow part) after our walk.
• Piano music does something odd to Buster. Tonight, we had been watching "Antiques Roadshow" on the local PBS station, and afterwards, the station showed a calendar of local events, with some piano music playing underneath. Buster pricked up his ears and started trotting around the house, from the back door to the front door, to my bedroom window, like he was looking for someone. He calmed down after the music stopped.
• Buster was a big help getting through Sunday. It was on Mother's Day last year that Nipper died. I sat under the pecan tree in the backyard, where Nipper and I spent his last afternoon enjoying the warm day and the breeze, with the windsock Mom had put there blowing around us, it's streamers falling down around Nipper's face and back. On Friday evening, I was at that spot planting some flowers there, when a breeze picked up and blew the streamers around my shoulders. Without even thinking, I said, "I miss you, too, Nipper." It really felt like my ol' pup was sending me a hug. Sunday was much the same as it was that Sunday last year, and as I sat there, Buster came and sat beside me. The wind turned and blew the streamers toward Buster, and they settled on his head and shoulders. And that was almost like Nipper saying "He's a good dog, too. He'll watch over you." I'm sure some people will think I'm reading too much into nothing, but that's what it felt like. And I really think love can transcend boundaries -- even the love from a dog.
• I'm doing well health-wise, and so is my family. My support group is another situation, however. One member has had a reoccurance and will begin chemo next week, after having had a mastectomy and surgery to remove a kidney, where a tumor was found. Her prospects, are good, and she's in good spirits. However another member told us at our meeting last week that the doctors told her she has six months to a year to live. She has battling this for almost three years straight. It seemed like she was on good ground and then they found new tumors -- first in her lungs, which went away with chemo, and this latest bout with tumors in her brain. The chemo seemed to be effective a couple months ago, though, as she reported they were shrinking. And then this news. It's kind of hard to take, because she has been so active all throughout these last few years, even with the treatment. She has a teenage son she's raising herself, and she's done a lot for the deaf community, both locally and at the state level. It just ain't right.

Vibrant spring

Spring is in full bloom around here, and it looks to be a good year for the flowers.

The hyacinths are just about faded, and the daffodils are starting to fade, but it looks like my work on the hillside the last few years is paying off. Not only were there a dozen or so blooming daffodils, but it appears we'll have a lot of irises blooming as well. Most of them have been in the ground on the hill for about three years now, so it's nice to see there will be some color there this spring. The mums and the aster I planted there last year are coming back (especially the aster), too, so there should be some late summer/fall color. Now I just need some summer-blooming flowers to put there. Maybe some native flowers that could withstand the sun and heat.

I don't know if it's just me, but the flowering trees around here seem to be much more vibrant this year, especially the redbud trees. There's lots of them around here -- they do very well in the prairie, really -- and it just seems like their blooms are so much more plentiful and vivid than in years past. In fact, we discovered there five of them behind my property. We knew of two --- right near the back gate and a small one down on the creek bank -- but there a few other small ones, too. Not sure if they were there before and just didn't really bloom, or if they're new.

Speaking of trees, while my mom was traveling around the South in late winter/early spring, she fell in love with dogwood trees. So she bought two to bring home! We planted one with pink flowers in the back yard, and the other will go at my dad's house. So hopefully next year, we'll have some pretty flowering trees, too.

F*@#$% brilliant

I don't watch a lot of "South Park" anymore -- too many dull episodes and it got to full of itself after a few years -- but the episode I caught last night, where they lost the Internet, was terrific. One of the kids' families threw everything they owned onto the family SUV because they heard there was still Internet "out Californey way." The "Grapes of Wrath" spin was brilliant.

Even better, though, was the TV newspeople, who had nothing to say because they had no Internet and the anchors resorted to fighting over a fax machine set between them for information to read on the air.

How to get a bachelor's degree in one week

First, you go to college right out of high school. Five years later, and after dabbling in other areas besides your major, you get burned out and go home and work in a grocery store frying donuts then at the checkout and video rental until you get sick of that and find a job at the mom-and-pop radio station who's wiling to give a chance to someone with no experience but lots of enthusiasm and you have fun at what you call your "slacker job" for a few years until you get bored with that and up and quit one day and move back to the college town with all intentions of finishing your degree but that darn foreign language requirement keeps tripping you up because you just can't seem to conjugate anything more complex than "me gusta ..." and then a full-time job opens up in your field right there in town and so you get it and they don't seem too concerned that you don't actually have a degree so you just kind of drift through the next eight years until you realize that in that business, the only way things are going to change is because the bosses get stupider and stupider and care only about the bottom line, not what the mission of the business should be, so one day you check with the college and find out if you change your major to general studies you need only two credit hours -- and no foreign language -- to finish and there just happens to be two one-hour geology field trip classes in the summer that will fit the bill and 21 years after you started, you'll have a bachelor's degree with two days' worth of effort on a Sunday and the following Saturday.

Springing

Things are just springing up all over. I was out on the hill cleaning up flower beds this afternoon, and discovered the lamb's ears are sprouting. Hope they get along well before the grass does! My mini-irises are real pretty, there's daffodils with flower buds, hyacinths are sprouting ...

I've gotten a lot done today:
• made a batch of biscuits (I just wanted a drop biscuit or two for breakfast, but since I was too sleepy to read the ingredients list properly, I ended up with more than a dozen);
• cleaned up the kitchen, and got the dishes that need hand-washing done;
• took the recycling to the recycling center;
• cleaned up the garage and threw out a bunch of junk;
• put some other junk by my car so I can load it up Monday and take a trip to the county e-recycling center and the household hazardous waste site;
• painted an old popcorn tin to use as a container for all Buster's toys (that one's for you, Mom!);
• started a project to recycle my old cassette holder into something to help organize my computer desk area (more on that in a future post);
• cleaned up the aforementioned flower bed;
• put some chicken in the slow-cooker for shredding later this evening (and maybe some nachos tonight!).

That's it for the time being. Just taking a break before I take Buster for a walk and some playtime. I think he's liked being outside all day, but he's not happy he's not getting all my attention. When I sat down to start cleaning up the flower bed, he planted himself right in my lap for some affection!

Buster has been using his dog door when I'm not home, by the way. I found that out for sure this week when I came home on Tuesday. After I changed my clothes, I was about to sit on the bed to put my shoes on when I noticed the bed was covered with dead, dried up grass! "I wonder how that got here," I said, looking at Buster. He kind of ducked his head for a moment. And then I noticed that there was grass not only on the bed but at the foot of the bed ... across the bedroom floor out into the living room ... through the kitchen and dining area ... all the way to the dog door! I just had to laugh, really.

The MRI

So the MRI biopsy turned out great. The process was not that much fun. And since I started this blog in part to maybe give an idea of what cancer and its treatment are like, I thought I'd give it a description. Hope it helps someone.

The facility I went to, Cypress Medical Center, was great. The people were really nice and put me at ease. They weren't great at placing the IV, however. Three days later, and both my forearms are still bruised from where they poked me three or four times.

I went to the same room and MRI machine I'd been in the week before. I had to lie face down on the bench, and there were, for lack of a better description, cupholders. I had to put my arms up over my head. Then they made sure I was positioned correctly and squeezed the cup closed a bit (not as bad as a mammogram, though). Then they slid me into the machine. They ran an MRI on the breast again, and they'd told me if they didn't see anything this time, they wouldn't do the biopsy. That actually gave me a lot of hope. If there was something, they said, the computer would give them coordinates for the needle. The MRI took just a few minutes, and then the techs came back in the room and prepared me for the biopsy. That was a letdown, because obviously that meant they had seen something again.

I got a local anesthetic, so I didn't really feel anything. I mean, I could feel something, but it wasn't painful. Just kind of like being prodded. They inserted the needle, then it was back in the MRI so they could check the position of the needle. That took just a couple minutes. Then they came back in and went to work. There was just some whirring noise -- the needle getting tissue samples -- and that was it. This whole time, I was laying there with my arms streched above my head. It was making me stiff, so I brought my arms down and started to get up, but they stopped me -- I was still "pinned down" with the needle! So I had to wait a bit longer. As I finally did get up, I saw some blood in the "cupholder" and that kind of shook me. Not feeling or seeing anything, it was hard picture what was actually going on (even though deep down I did know). I guess it was just hat visual cue that reminded me what was going on.

Before I could leave, they had to patch me up. I had to lie on my back this time, and they cleaned the blood off me and then put a little "glue" to close the hole, then put one of those plastic "second skin" bandages on. I could shower the next day, they said, but no baths, and after taking the bandage off, I wasn't to scrub at the site for 10 days. When I did take the bandage off, I took a look, and was a little shocked. There's quite a hole there! Maybe it's mostly scab and the glue, but it looks almost a quarter-inch wide. So obviously, I'm not looking at it too much.

All in all, it wasn't horrible for me. But one woman in my support group last night said she wouldn't do an MRI again unless it was absolutely necessary -- with her arthritis, being in the MRI with her arms over her head was too painful. And I could certainly see how that could be. I'm not in too bad a shape, and the 15 or 20 minutes I was in there, it kind of hurt by the time I was done. I'll probably do it again, as the doctors recommend, but I don't know if I'd drive three hours for it again, unless the biopsy were necessary.

Everything's good

That's the news from the doc! After getting more and more anxious throughout the morning at work, I called my surgeon's office after the paper went to press, partly to see if the news was in, but mostly to make sure they had my cell phone number. Michelle, the office manager, took my number and said they hadn't gotten the report yet, so she would call and see if it was ready. About five minutes later, as I was talking to some friends about how anxious I was, my phone rang. It was Michelle -- Dr. K was in surgery for most of the day, but she was able to tell me the biopsy showed no cancer! Whoo-hoo!

I called my parents right away, then e-mailed my brother (I don't have his work number, and he usually just uses his cell phone for trips), and e-mailed a bunch of friends and ran around the building telling co-workers. More than a few tears were shed. My friend at work, Kim, and I went to lunch, and a bunch of us are going out for ice cream tomorrow. Hey, a girl's gotta celebrate!

My surgeon called later in the day (and she sounded a bit choked up, too). It's normal tissue. For some reason, and I guess there's not really anything to explain it, that particular area showed up as abnormal. But it's not, and that's great news. It's been kind of a stressful week, and I'm glad it's over!

Success!

We have a dog door! Dad and I got the door put in today. It's probably not as good a job as a pro would have done, but we got it done. One thing I found out: Don't assume your door is a solid-wood door just because it looks that way on the edge. Yep, my door is solid ... foam. Obviously, it made the job a lot easier than I thought it would be. And I definately couldn't have done it without Dad's help (BIG thanks, Dad!).

Now the task is getting Buster used to the idea he can go out whenever he wants. He was a bit scared of it at first, it seemed. He would only go through it if I held the flap out of the way (and some treats helped). But when I got home from the hotline tonight, he came out to greet me! He needed a bit of encouragement to come out through the door, but he did it without me holding the flap out of his way. I made him come in using the door, and he needed a bit more encouragement to do that. But he did, he got lots of loving and playing with his favorite squeaky toy! And as I've been sitting here at the computer, he keeps going to the door and sticking his head out, as if he's just checking what's going on in the yard. I'm sure he'll get the idea eventually. But life's going to be easier now, not having to run home on my long work days to let him out.

In other news

Spring is in sight. When I got home Tuesday, I took Buster out for a romp, and on the hill near the fence I spotted a few green sprigs of crocus leaves poking through the grass-clipping mulch. Ducks have been visiting my part of the creek the last few days. I've been seeing flocks of cranes heading north for about a week now, and of course the skunks are spreading their idea of perfume to attract a mate. Not to mention their carcasses on the highways, since they're too preoccupied to look both ways.

Today, it's supposed to be in the lower 70s, so I am going to attempt to put in a dog door so Buster can let himself out when I'm away at work. Actually, I guess there's no "attempt." Either I will put in a dog door or I'll need a new back door! Buster just will not go out when Dad comes over to let him out. I know he's somewhat fearful of men, but I would have thought he'd been around Dad enough to trust him when he opens the door and calls him to come out. But Dad says he always just hides in my bedroom. So yesterday, I closed both bedroom doors before I left for work. All Buster did was stand in the doorway, Dad said. He was really happy when I got home from the hotline at about 10:30! He went out about three times to do his business before we went to bed.

I'm pretty sure he'll catch on to the dog door quickly. A couple weeks ago, I used a big piece of cardboard with a dog-door sized hole to see how low I need to place the door that he can get in and out of OK. A few treats for enticement, and he was going through the cardboard with no problem. So maybe he's already got the idea in his head.

Tomorrow is supposed to be cooler and cloudy maybe with some rain. I hope the rain misses us. I have the whole day off and I'd love to get out and start cleaning up the gardens a bit.

Spoke too soon

So all my bitching about having to go to Wichita? I take that back. And I'll be going back on Monday.

Wednesday morning, almost first thing at work, I got a call from my surgeon here. "You don't want to hear from me," she said. "They found something." Gotta love how direct she is. (Really, she is the best). The MRI shows something, about 4 cm, in the right breast -- the opposite side of where I had my cancer. It took a minute or so for it sink in. And by the time I got off the phone with her, I was shaking and tearing up. I headed for the bathroom, pausing to ask a co-worker to come with me, and I told her what the doc had said. Poor Kim. She's lost some good friends and family to cancer, so I'm sure it was hard for her to hear what I said, but I'm glad she was there for me (and I told her so). She took me out to lunch, and then she even drove me to see my surgeon in the afternoon. It's hard to find friends like that.

I did go see the surgeon Wednesday afternoon, and she did a sonogram. But she couldn't find anything but a plain old cyst. That's a good sign, but I'll still be going back to Wichita, where they will do an MRI-guided biopsy. Dad will be going with me, so that'll be good. And the appointment is in the afternoon, so we don't have leave before dawn.

I'm doing all right. Some good words from friends, co-workers and family have done a lot of good. And playing with Buster takes my mind off things. I have a good feeling about this, really. I'll deal with whatever comes my way, but of course, I'm hoping for the best.

A long day's drive ... and for what?

That's what I'm wondering after spending a good chunk of the day on the road today.

There is a fairly recent recommendaton that women at high risk for breast cancer (and obviously, if you've had it, you're at high risk) should get a breast MRI each year in addition to a mammogram. Both my oncologist and surgeon encouraged me to do so, we got that arranged. There are three places I could have gone -- Denver, which is about an 8 hour drive; Salina, about 90 minutes; or Wichita, about 3 hours. My doctors suggested either Denver or Wichita, because the recommendation says the facility should be able to do a biopsy in case something is found (and the MRI machine here isn't that good, my oncologist said). That left me with the impression that the MRI would be examined once it's done, and if there was something questionable, you'd get further examination and maybe a biopsy while there.

But when we were making the appointment, my surgeon's office manager mentioned that they "wouldn't be able to do it the same day." I thought that was kind of strange, but they already had all my info, so I didn't say anything. So this morning, I got up way early, left before dawn and was in Wichita in plenty of time. The MRI itself took a little over half an hour, and I was in the facility for maybe an hour and a half total. As I was getting dressed to leave, one of the techs said I would get the results "in a day or two" from my doctor.

So this just has me wondering if it's really worth it to drive six hours for maybe an hour and a half of my time, when it's a great big IF wether or not there will be anything to be concerned about. Why not just drive to the facility that's 90 minutes away -- even if they can't do the biopsy -- when I'd just have to make another appointment and another trip IF the Wichita facility found something? If my doctors had found something and the biopsy would be a sure thing and could be done the same day -- and the whole procedure couldn't be done at or closer to home -- then I wouldn't have a problem with making that trip. But just for an annual, routine procedure? Yeah, that's a problem. It takes me a day away from work, and driving that much sucks my energy -- not to mention gas (and at over $3 a gallon, that's a BIG dea).

I'll bring this up at my next support group meeting. I know a couple of others have had it done also, so I'll see what they think. And next year, I'll mention I'd prefer to go closer to home. Or maybe suggest the local hospital work on getting a new MRI.

Sick sick sick

I'm tired of it. Being sick, that is. A week ago, I came down with a cold that had some kind of vendetta. Sore throat, stuffy and painful sinuses, runny nose, bad cough ... blech. I slept most of that day until I had to go to work at the hotline. Didn't go to either job Monday, and suffered through Wednesday, when I worked both jobs. I was supposed to work Thursday and Friday nights, too, but fortunately we have a new hotline assistant, and she wanted to start ASAP, so the boss asked if I wouldn't mind letting her have those nights. I was too glad to have that opportunity! I don't think I'd be in near as good as a shape if I had worked those three nights in a row -- and I'm still not in too great a shape!

I am feeling much better though, and have managed to catch up on the housework I hadn't been able to get to. You can actually see the countertops in the kitchen now, and I have clean clothes! I still have to catch up on about three rooms' worth of cleaning, but I don't work too many weeknights this week, so I think I'll be able to manage.

I did get some bad news about one of my support group members last week. She went into the hospital after some vomiting and bad headaches. They found two small tumors in her brain, for which she's geting radiation now. Someone who went to visit her said she is in great spirits, though, and looking forward to getting on with life, so that's good news. The hospital here lets you send e-mails to patients through their Web site (volunteers print them out, paste them into a card and deliver them to the person), so I sent her message since I probably shouldn't go in to a place with sick people when I have a bad cold. I'm hoping she does well, because she was another who was diagnosed around the same time I was. This will be her third time around with treatment. Go, Gina! You can beat it again!

Snow day

Well, a half day, at least. When I woke up this morning, there was already about 3 inches covering the ground. The snow wasn't as heavy in the town where I work, but it kept up all day (and blowing), and when I got home about 1:30 this afternoon, there was probably about 7 inches on the ground here. I had scooped a path on the back patio to the garage before I left for work, and when I got home, you couldn't tell I'd done that.

Before I got settled in and cozy inside, I scooped paths in back and up front, not that you can tell now, and decided to put out some more birdseed. The birds did not want to leave the feeders, though, and one little female finch wouldn't get off the thistle feeder until I nudged her a few times with my finger! I've gotten within a couple feet of the feeders before they fly off sometimes, but never have I ever been able to walk right up to the feeder, let alone touch a wild bird!

I tried my mom's chili recipe for the first time today (after she FINALLY she gave me the recipe). I browned the meat Sunday and tossed it and the other ingredients in the slowcooker this morning. It tasted just as good as when she makes it, I thought, but I'll take some to Dad tomorrow (after the snow dies down) and see if he thinks it's just as good as what he calls Mom's "damn good chili." I filled up on that and cornbread muffins this afternoon, and had popcorn for dinner. Hey, it's a snow day, I can indulge!

Looks like I need to get a dog door in pronto. Mom is off on her next adventure, so Buster has some long days by himself when I'm working the hotline on a weekday. I hate leaving him alone, but I thought I could wait until spring to put in a dog door (since you're supposed to take the door off its hinges to install one) and in the meantime, Dad could come over and let him out on those long days.

Buster's timid around strangers, especially men, but I thought he was used to Dad by now and would be OK. We tried it Sunday, when I worked an 8-hour shift on the hotline, but Dad said Buster would not go out for him. He greeted Dad at the door, but went right into my bedroom and wouldn't come out. So I guess Operation Dog Door gets moved up. It's supposed to warm up toward the weekend, so maybe I can get something done soon.

I fixed my shower door! One of the rollers had come out on one of the sliding doors last week, so I have just kind of avoided using it. Once I got a look at it today, though, and saw what needed to be done, it didn't take very long. It was simple, but I'm kind of proud of myself and feeling all handy. Not that I'm going to go put in a dog door right now or anything.

Overworked

The past week has not been a great one. I've been putting in a lot of hours at the second job, due mostly to the fact the boss hasn't gotten around to hiring a new hotline assistant. My friend Judy, who helped me get this job, gave her notice more than three weeks ago. Her last day was the 16th (except that she's working today, since I'm working at the paper today and there's no way I could have done both jobs on a Saturday), and the boss is just now putting an ad for the job in Sunday's paper. Until now, all she'd done was call some people who had applied for the job at the same time I did -- months ago -- and couldn't seem to understand why none of them called her back. Duh!

It didn't help that the other hotline assistant had a family emergency and couldn't work two of her days. So I've had six days on this week's pay period alone -- twice what I should have! Add to that I had to get the paper's annual bridal tab laid out this week, and put in extra hours Tuesday and had to deal with the stupid software we have corrupting my file more than once, and I've had a very stressful week. And it's not necessarily over, at least until another hotline assistant is hired and trained.

So I'm just kind of kicking back this morning until I have to go in the paper to work. I slept in, and Buster and I went and filled the birdfeeders then played around the yard for awhile. Then we worked on some agility training, and Buster's doing quite well with that! For Christmas, my brother got me this agility kit. We haven't gotten to use it too much because of all the snow and cold and me working, but we got the chance to do it a couple times this week. I'm having fun. Buster has fun, once he figures out what I want him to do, and that the things aren't anything to be afraid of! So far, he's learned to do the high jump (actually the not-so-high-jump), and today, I got him to go through the tunnel a few times. He even did both in succession ... sort of. I can't wait for him to learn the weave poles, but the instruction book says that's usually the hardest part to train for, so I'll probably leave that for last, when the weather might be a bit warmer and we can get out more frequently.

There's no dog agility clubs or competitions where I live (not outside of 4-H, and I'm a bit old for that) at least that I know of, but maybe I'll post something somewhere and see if there's some interest. Even if there's not, it's been fun to do, so great gift, bro!

Some updates

I've been working on updating my Web site, Bad Dogs and the Women Who Love Them.(If you have that bookmarked, you'll have to change it). It just didn't seem right to keep Nipper on there now that he's gone. I didn't want to do away with it entirely, though, even though I haven't done much with it for years.

So I've redone the index page and profiles of Buster and I. Nipper's presence is still there, of course, since he was the inspiration, and I'll soon prepare a memorial page for him. There will be some other changes, too, slowly. Keep checking in.

Heat!

We have heat! After two months, the furnace is finally working! And I essentially have a brand-new furnace, for probably less than a third of the cost. It's nice and cozy warm here, and even my closet feels nice.

The bad thing is, dad's furnace went out on him this afternoon, or at some point today. The blower wouldn't stop and it was only putting out cool air, no heat. So he and Mom got it to quit by pulling the fuse on it so that part of the house would still have power and Mom took the space heaters we had been using to his house. Hopefully, it won't be anything big and can be fixed a lot faster than mine was!

It's a cold bugger, out there, too. I think it got to only the 20s today, and isn't supposed to get too much warmer through the next week. So I hope it won't take too long. Especially since Buster needs to burn off some energy! I come home and he wants to play ALL. NIGHT. LONG. He needs to get out for a good walk and some frisbee chasing when I get home.

Which might happen less for a while. One of the other hotline assistants quit, and they haven't hired anyone else yet. So I might have to pick up a few extra hours. But I'm not going to let that go on for long. It's just not worth it to be away from Buster and home (and do things like laundry) or be available to help Mom or Dad that much. There's plenty of other jobs out there, but I do like this one, since I'm basically paid $7 an hour to sit and wait for the phone to ring. Otherwise, I can read, write, surf the Net on their computer or play solitare, or sometimes I'll take my computer and work on personal stuff. If only I could take Buster, it'd be perfect.

Two warnings

Damn, I'm tired of it being cold in my house. It's not literally freezing, no danger really of the pipes bursting or anything, but it's just hard to get going in the mornings when it's cold. In case you are wondering, my furnace is still not working. Yeah, since before Thanksgiving. Except for the compressor, I basically have a new furnace, I think. And I'm not holding out hope that thing won't go either.

The first part, by the time the guy got my check and it cleared, it was on backorder, so we had to wait. Then when that got in, the furnace was still doing its mini-exlosion thing, so the repair guy had to check with the manufacturer and found it was the control board in the unit. So that had to be ordered. Then when he got that in, while we were gone, he left a note that try it, should work, and when Mom turned it on, the whole house started vibrating. Seems some packing material was still in there and was blocking the blower. He came out the next day, got that fixed, but then the blower wouldn't come on. So he's got some kind of valve ordered and we're waiting for that to come in.

I don't know what's worse. Not having heat because the electricity went out, or not having heat because of this. Now, we at least have electricity for space heaters, and while it gets chilly in the mornings, at least it's not the 40-some degrees inside during last year's ice storm. But after the ice storm, it was only a couple days we were without heat. I just want my damn furnace working.

And yeah, I probably could have avoided this with having regular maintenence done before winter, but know what? That costs money. And my newspaper job paid me only enough to get by with the basics. At least until 2006. I sat down last summer and figured it out. My regular expenses -- and I don't have a lot of extras I pay for -- went up more than 20 percent from 2006 to 2007. My paycheck? Went up by not even 2 percent. Guess what. That don't add up. Hence, the second job. Now I'm having to play catch-up on all the things I should have been able to do.

So, two warnings: Have your furnace checked when the weather's warm, and don't go into journalism if you want to be able to afford to do things like that.