Monday, January 23, 2006

Hello again

Things didn't necessarily improve after my last post. I guess Neupogen is trying to get its last shots in on me or something. My stomach was upset for days, I couldn't eat much and I got a bit depressed. I'm still not really out of it totally. I'm still feeling a bit down, and my stomach was still a bit upset today, plus I've got some heartburn. I'm just so tired of being sick and tired all the time. I just want to feel good again, and it's not happening fast enough.

Then on top of it all, I go to a job that I don't feel all that good about, either. Somehow, I just feel like I don't fit in there anymore. Even when I was back in the newsroom, it didn't feel like I was part of things. I go in, do the mundane tasks, and go home, and only a few people -- not anyone who decides how much or what work I do -- really tries to include me in anything. I've tried getting myself back into things, with little response. Maybe I just don't care enough about this place anymore to try that hard.

Maybe this next year would be a good time to take some classes, learn some new skills and then when I'm all done with my treatment (and don't have to worry so much about the insurance issues) move on. It's too late to enroll in this semester, so maybe I should look into that before summer.

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