Today I feel like crap. I had a flu shot and pneumonia shot yesterday during my doctor's visit, and today I have been feeling it. My arm hurts like hell and last night I was feeling achey. I didn't feel much better this morning, but went to work anyway. I probably shouldn't have, because I felt miserable all morning and got snippy with a couple of people when I normally wouldn't have.
I came home after we finished up the paper at 1 p.m. and slept for practically the whole afternoon. I feel better tonight, but still feel a bit fatigued and my shoulder still hurts.
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Goodbye, and round two
My brother left this morning. He delayed his departure a day because of the weather, but today was much better. The interstate had been closed since Sunday -- more than 400 miles westbound all the way to Denver -- and it opened early this morning. I drove that way (eastbound) into town this morning and the traffic going the other way was incredible, even hours after it opened. All I kept thinking was "We got us a convoy!" (If you're not old enough to know what that means, Google it.)
Saying goodbye to my brother usually isn't that big a deal. We see him usually just once a year, but it always wasn't that hard to say "see you next year." But this time it was hard. I had difficulty saying the word "goodbye" because I got all choked up. Maybe it's because in the back of my mind is always the thought "what if I hadn't found the lump?" This could have been the last time we saw each other. That's hard to take when something brings that thought bubbling up to the surface.
On a different note, I had a visit with the oncologist today. The bad news is I won't get through the holidays chemo-free. The good news is I'll be through with chemo by early spring. Maybe I'll have enough hair by summer it'll just look like a warm-weather crop.
I start next week. This time, I'll be getting just one drug, taxotere. It has a lot of the same type of side effects as the drugs I got previously -- fatigue, nausea, etc. That will be on the same schedule as the previous rounds, once every three weeks for about three months. In addition, I'll also start on herceptin, once a week for a year. After I finish with the taxotere, I'll have five weeks of radiation. That will be done five days a week. So, except for the herceptin, I'll be all done with this by April!
I hope I'll have as easy a time as I did with the other drugs. I've been pretty lucky, from what I've read of other people's experiences with the side effects. And hopefully this will be the last time I have to go through with it.
Saying goodbye to my brother usually isn't that big a deal. We see him usually just once a year, but it always wasn't that hard to say "see you next year." But this time it was hard. I had difficulty saying the word "goodbye" because I got all choked up. Maybe it's because in the back of my mind is always the thought "what if I hadn't found the lump?" This could have been the last time we saw each other. That's hard to take when something brings that thought bubbling up to the surface.
On a different note, I had a visit with the oncologist today. The bad news is I won't get through the holidays chemo-free. The good news is I'll be through with chemo by early spring. Maybe I'll have enough hair by summer it'll just look like a warm-weather crop.
I start next week. This time, I'll be getting just one drug, taxotere. It has a lot of the same type of side effects as the drugs I got previously -- fatigue, nausea, etc. That will be on the same schedule as the previous rounds, once every three weeks for about three months. In addition, I'll also start on herceptin, once a week for a year. After I finish with the taxotere, I'll have five weeks of radiation. That will be done five days a week. So, except for the herceptin, I'll be all done with this by April!
I hope I'll have as easy a time as I did with the other drugs. I've been pretty lucky, from what I've read of other people's experiences with the side effects. And hopefully this will be the last time I have to go through with it.
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Winter is here
It's been an odd day today. It started out fairly nice -- sunshine, partly cloudy, temperature around 50. I took Nipper for his walk a little after 10:30 a.m. because I knew that was going to change. But I didn't know just how much.
By the time we got to the campground on the other side of town, the skies had turned gray and a stiff breeze was blowing from the north. By the time we got back home, I was feeling raindrops. The forecast at that time was still calling for just rain during the day, turning to snow overnight with about an inch by morning.
I got some laundry done and started the dishwasher, and then we headed over to dad's, probably around 1 p.m. Within a couple hours, the snow had changed to rain. And it was really coming down. Mom, bro and I left dad's about 5:30. The cars were covered with slush, and the roads were starting to get slushy too. And the wind was howling from the north.
About 8 p.m., the power went out for a few minutes. Mom debated hitting the road for work. The Interstate is closed from about 50 miles east of here to the Colorado line, and checking with the highway patrol, they had already worked one accident on the old U.S. highway.
Mom took off early for work. She called just a bit ago. She was able to get on the Interstate and follow in someone's tracks. Another driver from here caught up to her -- turned out it was a co-worker also on his way in. It took her about twice as long to get to work as normal.
Power was out again for about 20 or 30 minutes, and it just blinked off again. The lights keep flickering. I told Dad he can come over here if he doesn't get power back and wants to keep warm. I'd probably need to go get him since my CRV has available four-wheel drive.
My brother is thinking he might stay an extra day, since this stuff might continue tomorrow morning. They just said on the news travelers are being put up in high schools and community buildings. The interstate might be closed about 60 miles further east.
All this and in eastern Kansas, there were severe thunderstorms and tornados today.
I don't think I'll be sleeping good tonight.
By the time we got to the campground on the other side of town, the skies had turned gray and a stiff breeze was blowing from the north. By the time we got back home, I was feeling raindrops. The forecast at that time was still calling for just rain during the day, turning to snow overnight with about an inch by morning.
I got some laundry done and started the dishwasher, and then we headed over to dad's, probably around 1 p.m. Within a couple hours, the snow had changed to rain. And it was really coming down. Mom, bro and I left dad's about 5:30. The cars were covered with slush, and the roads were starting to get slushy too. And the wind was howling from the north.
About 8 p.m., the power went out for a few minutes. Mom debated hitting the road for work. The Interstate is closed from about 50 miles east of here to the Colorado line, and checking with the highway patrol, they had already worked one accident on the old U.S. highway.
Mom took off early for work. She called just a bit ago. She was able to get on the Interstate and follow in someone's tracks. Another driver from here caught up to her -- turned out it was a co-worker also on his way in. It took her about twice as long to get to work as normal.
Power was out again for about 20 or 30 minutes, and it just blinked off again. The lights keep flickering. I told Dad he can come over here if he doesn't get power back and wants to keep warm. I'd probably need to go get him since my CRV has available four-wheel drive.
My brother is thinking he might stay an extra day, since this stuff might continue tomorrow morning. They just said on the news travelers are being put up in high schools and community buildings. The interstate might be closed about 60 miles further east.
All this and in eastern Kansas, there were severe thunderstorms and tornados today.
I don't think I'll be sleeping good tonight.
Thursday, November 24, 2005
Happy Thanksgiving
Hope everybody had a good one. Ours was nice and quiet and full of good food.
I slept in 'til about 9:30, then puttered around while I got woke up. Dad & my brother came over around 11 a.m. and we all watched "Star Wars," then started getting things ready to cook dinner over at Dad's house. I took Nipper for a good walk. It was a sunny day, a bit chilly, but it was a nice walk. We eventually all ended up at Dad's by midafternoon while dinner cooked and we watched the football game. Well, Dad watched and I just kind of sat around. It's best to stay out of Mom's way when she's cooking.
We had a good dinner -- turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, rolls, peas and corn, salad -- and all had to sit around a bit before tackling the apple pie. We watched "Survivor," played some games and finally, when Nipper started giving us that "can we go home" look, we packed things up at about 10 p.m. and Mom & I came home.
Tomorrow, back to work. Avoiding the shopping at all costs. Then a nice weekend and ... back to work. You know the drill.
I slept in 'til about 9:30, then puttered around while I got woke up. Dad & my brother came over around 11 a.m. and we all watched "Star Wars," then started getting things ready to cook dinner over at Dad's house. I took Nipper for a good walk. It was a sunny day, a bit chilly, but it was a nice walk. We eventually all ended up at Dad's by midafternoon while dinner cooked and we watched the football game. Well, Dad watched and I just kind of sat around. It's best to stay out of Mom's way when she's cooking.
We had a good dinner -- turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, rolls, peas and corn, salad -- and all had to sit around a bit before tackling the apple pie. We watched "Survivor," played some games and finally, when Nipper started giving us that "can we go home" look, we packed things up at about 10 p.m. and Mom & I came home.
Tomorrow, back to work. Avoiding the shopping at all costs. Then a nice weekend and ... back to work. You know the drill.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Quiet week
Dad is all moved in at his new place here in town, and my brother arrived Monday for his Thanksgiving visit. It's good to have everyone all together again, and even better now that Dad and bro don't have to sleep on the couch or the floor, especially since I have to work most of the week. I always hated having to get ready for work while they were sleeping in the living room.
I'm off Thursday, and we'll be having dinner at Dad's, since he's got an actual dining room with an actual dining table. He still needs some more seating in the living room, but we'll make do.
Nipper has been to his house a couple times now, and he does his usual thing. After about five minutes, he starts giving me that "can we go home?" look. And when he realizes we're not going anywhere, he finds a place to settle down and pouts. He did seem to enjoy lying on the porch there the other day. It was fairly warm and the porch faces south, so it had plenty of sunshine.
Not much else is going on. Tomorrow a couple of us from work are meeting for lunch with a former co-worker who now lives in Indiana and another former co-worker who quit about a month or so ago. It'll be good to see both of them again and get caught up. I haven't seen J. since right after I was diagnosed, but I know she checks in here so she's at least seen a picture of me without my hair.
Everyone seems to take it pretty well, not really making any kind of comment about how I look. When out in public, I keep looking around a lot to see if anyone's staring or making comments. It's only happened a couple of times, really, so it hasn't been a pain.
Well, not much going on this week. Next Tuesday I find out what the rest of my treatment will be, so I'll have more then. To all in the U.S., have a happy Thanksgiving if you don't check in before then, and don't go too crazy on Black Friday.
I'm off Thursday, and we'll be having dinner at Dad's, since he's got an actual dining room with an actual dining table. He still needs some more seating in the living room, but we'll make do.
Nipper has been to his house a couple times now, and he does his usual thing. After about five minutes, he starts giving me that "can we go home?" look. And when he realizes we're not going anywhere, he finds a place to settle down and pouts. He did seem to enjoy lying on the porch there the other day. It was fairly warm and the porch faces south, so it had plenty of sunshine.
Not much else is going on. Tomorrow a couple of us from work are meeting for lunch with a former co-worker who now lives in Indiana and another former co-worker who quit about a month or so ago. It'll be good to see both of them again and get caught up. I haven't seen J. since right after I was diagnosed, but I know she checks in here so she's at least seen a picture of me without my hair.
Everyone seems to take it pretty well, not really making any kind of comment about how I look. When out in public, I keep looking around a lot to see if anyone's staring or making comments. It's only happened a couple of times, really, so it hasn't been a pain.
Well, not much going on this week. Next Tuesday I find out what the rest of my treatment will be, so I'll have more then. To all in the U.S., have a happy Thanksgiving if you don't check in before then, and don't go too crazy on Black Friday.
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Back among the living ... if you can call it that
I am out of my "isolation chamber" at work and back in the newsroom! It wasn't a huge adjustment to make, getting used to being around people again. I'd missed the chatter on the scanner and the joking between reporters and editors. I do miss, however, being able to play my CDs kinda loud and having a private place to talk. But I'll be back there in a little over a month anyway when I prepare for my next round of treatment. I'll know on the 29th what that schedule will be, but at last word it won't start until after Christmas. So probably a week or so before, depending on how many cold/flu bugs are running around the office, I'll move back into my "office." Maybe by then I'll have some new music.
The sutures from my surgery are healing pretty well, although the upper one is still looking kinda icky at one end. It's still red and a bit swollen, even though I've been putting an antibiotic cream on it at least a couple times a day (well, almost). I've taken to cleaning it with a cotton swab the last couple days, and while a little gross, it looks a little better. I'll see what the surgeon says on Friday.
Tomorrow, Mom and I head off southeast with her truck and will return with not only it loaded up, but also a U-Haul to move my dad up here. It might be a bit strange having both my parents that close again, but it'll be good too. He'll be around if we need the help when my treatment starts up again, and he'll be close by in case he needs us too. So maybe no report tomorrow, but probably Friday after meeting with the surgeon.
The sutures from my surgery are healing pretty well, although the upper one is still looking kinda icky at one end. It's still red and a bit swollen, even though I've been putting an antibiotic cream on it at least a couple times a day (well, almost). I've taken to cleaning it with a cotton swab the last couple days, and while a little gross, it looks a little better. I'll see what the surgeon says on Friday.
Tomorrow, Mom and I head off southeast with her truck and will return with not only it loaded up, but also a U-Haul to move my dad up here. It might be a bit strange having both my parents that close again, but it'll be good too. He'll be around if we need the help when my treatment starts up again, and he'll be close by in case he needs us too. So maybe no report tomorrow, but probably Friday after meeting with the surgeon.
Friday, November 11, 2005
Getting better
The sutures aren't painful at all now, just kind of annoying. I was able to take a decent shower this morning with just a slight discomfort. Up until yesterday, I had to hurry through my shower because going braless was just uncomfortable as hell. Maybe tonight I'll try sleeping without one. Maybe.
Finished up my first week back at work. It was only a three-day work week, but it seemed long enough. I'm not sure I even like what I do anymore. It's not the same, not as satisfying or even interesting to me. It's frustrating more often than not. I don't think it's just the particular place I'm at either. It seems like the industry as a whole is changing, and not for the better. Part of me thinks I should stick it out and fight for what journalism should be, and another part of me is saying know when the battle is lost.
Unfortunately, there's not a lot of call where I'm at for the kinds of talent and skill I have. And other jobs around here pay far less and/or have lesser benefits. And maybe now isn't the best time to making that kind of change in my life. So I guess I just have to muddle through and hope something will happen that might spark some interest in what I do again.
Well, the weekend is here at least. I should get my car in for an oil change, and maybe a wash since it's fairly nice. Maybe a trip to the library to find something to read the rest of the weekend.
Finished up my first week back at work. It was only a three-day work week, but it seemed long enough. I'm not sure I even like what I do anymore. It's not the same, not as satisfying or even interesting to me. It's frustrating more often than not. I don't think it's just the particular place I'm at either. It seems like the industry as a whole is changing, and not for the better. Part of me thinks I should stick it out and fight for what journalism should be, and another part of me is saying know when the battle is lost.
Unfortunately, there's not a lot of call where I'm at for the kinds of talent and skill I have. And other jobs around here pay far less and/or have lesser benefits. And maybe now isn't the best time to making that kind of change in my life. So I guess I just have to muddle through and hope something will happen that might spark some interest in what I do again.
Well, the weekend is here at least. I should get my car in for an oil change, and maybe a wash since it's fairly nice. Maybe a trip to the library to find something to read the rest of the weekend.
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Back to reality
Today was my first day back at work since the surgery. It wasn't as awful as I had been dreading early this week. It was good to see people again, and everybody was pretty happy about my news from the surgery. I might be able to get moved out of the "isolation chamber" back into the newsroom for awhile, since I won't have any treatment for several weeks and my blood counts are good. Of course, as it gets later into December, I'll have to be more careful about being around anyone who's got a cold or something catching. But if I can get back into the newsroom for at least a few weeks, I think that will help my outlook quite a bit.
Monday, November 07, 2005
All OK
Saw the surgeon this morning for all of three seconds. She took a quick look, said it's just a reaction to the sutures and some antibiotic cream will be enough.
Didn't sleep well last night, so I'm off for a nap.
Didn't sleep well last night, so I'm off for a nap.
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Ugh
Just looked at my sutures, and one of them appears to be infected. It's the one under my arm, the one the surgeon made to check the lymph nodes. One end of the incision is red and kind of swollen, and it looks like there's some pus. Not pleasant (hope you aren't eating while reading this). The other one -- the one she used to go after the lump -- looks OK. I have a call in to my surgeon. I'll update again after I hear from her.
UPDATE, 6:00 p.m. I'll see the surgeon tomorrow morning.
UPDATE, 6:00 p.m. I'll see the surgeon tomorrow morning.
Friday, November 04, 2005
A fine day
Had the follow-up visit with my surgeon this afternoon, and it was good all around. She said when my reports came into the cancer center yesterday, they were jumping up and down! The cancer is gone. I'll have to have a mammogram after the first of the year (after my breast "calms down" from the surgery -- what a mental picture that makes!) just to make sure, but she's pretty confident that it's 100 percent gone!
That doesn't mean I'm out of the woods yet, though. I still have to finish my chemotherapy, another three months, and that will be followed by several weeks of radiation. That won't likely start until after Christmas, though, from what my oncologist told me at the last visit. I'll see her again around the end of this month and will learn more then.
After the doctor's visit, my parents took me to Home Depot and bought me my Christmas present -- a storm door for the front door of my house. That'll be nice, since the door is on the north side of the house. It might be my birthday present, too, but that's OK. It's needed.
Getting a little tired and I'm a bit sore, so I think I'm off for a nap.
Later
That doesn't mean I'm out of the woods yet, though. I still have to finish my chemotherapy, another three months, and that will be followed by several weeks of radiation. That won't likely start until after Christmas, though, from what my oncologist told me at the last visit. I'll see her again around the end of this month and will learn more then.
After the doctor's visit, my parents took me to Home Depot and bought me my Christmas present -- a storm door for the front door of my house. That'll be nice, since the door is on the north side of the house. It might be my birthday present, too, but that's OK. It's needed.
Getting a little tired and I'm a bit sore, so I think I'm off for a nap.
Later
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Getting better
At least that's what I keep telling myself. I'm still pretty sore from the surgery, but it has been only two days. Sleeping isn't as difficult as I thought it might be. As long as I can prop myself up with enough pillows, I seem to be comfortable enough. The percocet helps, too.
It's been pretty slow around here, but that's what I need. I wish it wasn't so nice out, though, since I'm not really up for getting out and enjoying it. It's been in the 70s and today is supposed to be in the 80s. Maybe I'll at least go sit outside with Nipper for awhile this afternoon.
Watched "Monster In Law" this morning. Get that sent back to Netflix today and see if I can get Star Wars before I have to go back to work.
Not much else to report. Maybe later.
It's been pretty slow around here, but that's what I need. I wish it wasn't so nice out, though, since I'm not really up for getting out and enjoying it. It's been in the 70s and today is supposed to be in the 80s. Maybe I'll at least go sit outside with Nipper for awhile this afternoon.
Watched "Monster In Law" this morning. Get that sent back to Netflix today and see if I can get Star Wars before I have to go back to work.
Not much else to report. Maybe later.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Me again
Thanks, Bec for posting an update today. I was certainly in no shape to do it myself.
I'm doing better now, though, after sleeping most of the day. I'm sore, but don't have a lot of pain, thanks to the percocet. I am able to get up and move around by myself, and am moving my arm a little bit, as the doctor told me to, so it doesn't get too stiff.
I'm taking at least a week off from work, so guess I'll get a lot of movie watching and reading done. My dad came up for a few days to help out. I guess he's staying until Saturday.
Well, "Amazing Race" is on, so I'll sign off now. Tune in tomorrow!
I'm doing better now, though, after sleeping most of the day. I'm sore, but don't have a lot of pain, thanks to the percocet. I am able to get up and move around by myself, and am moving my arm a little bit, as the doctor told me to, so it doesn't get too stiff.
I'm taking at least a week off from work, so guess I'll get a lot of movie watching and reading done. My dad came up for a few days to help out. I guess he's staying until Saturday.
Well, "Amazing Race" is on, so I'll sign off now. Tune in tomorrow!
She's Home!
Update! Update! Update!
Surgery is over and Juno is home! Juno's Mom indicates that surgery went very well and there is FANTASTIC news---her lymph nodes were negative of cancer cells and the tumor appears to be gone! Yippeeee! She'll soon learn about future treatments, but no more chemo for awhile.
Juno and her parents extend their thanks for all the thoughts and prayers--THEY WORK!
Personally, I'd like to thank Juno for sharing the details of her battle with this horrible disease. I appreciate the honesty and enjoy the humor which she frequently draws upon. I hope with all my heart that the worst is now behind her!
-posted by Bec
Surgery is over and Juno is home! Juno's Mom indicates that surgery went very well and there is FANTASTIC news---her lymph nodes were negative of cancer cells and the tumor appears to be gone! Yippeeee! She'll soon learn about future treatments, but no more chemo for awhile.
Juno and her parents extend their thanks for all the thoughts and prayers--THEY WORK!
Personally, I'd like to thank Juno for sharing the details of her battle with this horrible disease. I appreciate the honesty and enjoy the humor which she frequently draws upon. I hope with all my heart that the worst is now behind her!
-posted by Bec
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